Pt. 15

"Are you sure?" I've been trying for three days; she still isn't caving.

"Yes, Josh. I'm positive."

"I'm just thinking about your leg; I could be helpful." Why doesn't she see this my way?

"You most certainly could not be helpful."

"Donna!"

"What I meant was that although you are a wonderful and helpful person, you would not be helpful in this specific situation."

"Donna, I do it everyday, I think I could help you do it." That's logical.

"Joshua Lyman, put those dimples away…. I'm not looking." She closed her eyes, no fair.

"We could do it together, it would save time." See, logical again.

"You think doing it together would save time? You don't think we'd get…distracted?"

"We would focus." I'm not saying what I'd focus on, but I would definitely focus.

"Like we did last night during the movie…again."

"I was extremely focused on what I was doing during the movie." Is it my fault she lost focus on what she was doing, again?

"Yes, yes you were." Damn right I was. "But that doesn't change the fact that it's Tuesday and we still haven't watched it."

Ok, so we still have the movie. In fact, we've had it for five days and we're not quite half way through it. I think before it's all said and done, I'll end up buying it. Small price to pay if you ask me.

"Please, please, please let me help." That sounded not only eager, but also somewhat desperate.

"Let's say I accept your offer. How long do you think it would take you to… help me?" I love our secret code words; it's what we do.

I look her over. "I don't know, an hour maybe."

"An hour! I can do it in fifteen minutes."

"Well, I would want to be thorough," I say as I smirk a little.

"So instead of saving time, it would actually take longer?"

"Well, when you put it that way..." Technicalities.

"I'm going in now. Alone."

"Fine, but I'm asking again tomorrow." You offer to help an injured woman shower, and see where it gets you.

**********

"I'm glad I got you alone, I need your help," I say when after we order. CJ and I are at lunch, celebrating the fact that today at torture therapy, Helga the Horrible, whose real name is Rebecca, gave me clearance for part-time cane use. Take that, Amy Cruella Gardner.

"What's up?" she asks excitedly.

"Sam and Josh have developed a schedule."

"What kind of schedule?"

"A relationship schedule. It's like a time line."

"For whose relationship?" I look pointedly at her. "Not yours and Josh's? Please tell me you aren't letting Josh and Sam plan your future."

"I told you I need your help." This is CJ's sort of thing. I secretly believe she would've been a spy if it weren't for her height making her stand out.

"Ok, don't panic. What do we know?"

"Something is happening on November 13th."

"What's November 13th?"

"Three months after we started dating. Also, something is going on with the number 5. It could be the 5th, it could be at 5 weeks, 5 months, or 5 years, I have no idea."

"What else?"

"Friday is the `love' day. That's all I know."

"The `love' day?"

"The day Josh is going to tell me he loves me for the first time."

"They scheduled the first admission of love?"

"Yes, and if they scheduled that, what else did they schedule?"

"Well, we've got to figure that out, and then figure out where those things fall on this schedule." She gets out a pen and notebook. "Ok, there's love. There's meeting the family, there's engagement, there's sex, there's marriage, there's kids, there's moving in, there's…"

"Kids?" I practically scream. We're not even to waist-down action yet, and CJ's talking about kids?

"Kids."

"Sam and Josh are planning out my kids?"

"Possibly."

"We've got to get a hold of this list, CJ."

**********

"So, I hear you went grocery shopping." CJ says on our way to senior staff on Wednesday.

"You sound shocked," I say with a hint of laughter in my voice.

"I'm shocked to find out you know where a grocery store is, the fact that you went into it is beyond shocking. It's…"

"Are you impressed?" I ask a bit smugly.

"I'm scared is what I am. Although more about the blow-drying than the shopping."

"She told you about the blow-drying?" I choke out. I think I'm going to be ill.

"Yes she did," she says raising her eyebrows and giving me an evil smile.

"Any chance you're…"

"Going to keep that to myself? That's up to you?" Up to me? I'm scared.

"What do you want?" I ask hesitantly.

"What's happening on…" she looks around. What is she, a spy? "November 13th?"

I swallow hard. Donna was paying attention to my conversation with Sam on Sunday. Why am I shocked? "November 13th?"

"Don't play dumb with me, Josh. I need details."

"I don't know what you're talking about," I say innocently as Toby walks by.

"Toby, you'll never guess what Josh did on Sunday." Toby stops and stares at us.

"Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait," I say to CJ. "Don't do anything drastic."

"November 13th, Josh."

I have to think about this. For one thing, I can't give the details of the schedule to CJ, she'll no doubt tell Donna. They're attached at the hip. On the other hand, I can't have CJ tell Toby about the blow-drying. What do I do?

"November 13th…" I say, stalling. "There's nothing to it." I'm starting to sweat. "We're just trying to find a time for Donna and me to go visit Sam and his new girlfriend."

CJ looks at me carefully, and then turns to Toby. "Josh begged Donna to let him blow-dry her hair on Sunday. He's apparently obsessed with it and can't keep his hands out of it. According to Donna, he used the low setting and was very careful." Then she looks at me. "Next time I ask you a question, don't lie to me." She walks calmly into Leo's office as I stare after her in disbelief and Toby looks at the ground, stifling a laugh.

**********

"Did you get anything?" she asks as I walk by her desk.

"No, but I scared him. Next time I ask something, he'll answer the question."

"What did you do?" she asks me excitedly. She and I were meant for this. We're like Sydney Bristow. Well, except that neither of us is dating Michael Vaughn, hottie CIA agent.

"I told Toby about the blow-drying."

Her eyes get huge and she tries not to laugh. "CJ, I'm going to get into trouble for that. He already calls me Judas."

"Ahh, the pet names have begun." This time she does laugh.

"Don't worry. He won't say a word about it."

"He won't?"

"No."

"Why?"

"Because to do so, he'd have to bring up November 13th."

She smiles and shakes her head. "And he won't do that because then I'll ask about it."

"Right."

"So he'll play dumb and I'll play dumb, and we'll both pretend it's not out there." Kind of like they did with their feelings for seven years.

"Yes, but you know what this means." I say quietly.

"We're going to have to go through Sam," she says nodding. "He's weak, he'll never be able to withstand you."

"He won't know what hit him."