ACT FOUR
INT:
"I tell you, the last one I thought was going to bring the house down." But Senator Edward McBain laughed heartily as he made his pronouncement. The man obviously liked an audience. His current one included Josh, Donna, and his wife-- whose first name had been given to her by her Hungarian emigrant parents and was so hard to pronounce that she just went by 'Sassy.'
Sassy McBain brushed his shoulder playfully. "Edward, don't be so melodramatic; we haven't had one that's been over a 3.0 in five years. Just the normal tremors that happen when you live near the Cascades." The woman proclaimed it as only a proud native could.
"Aren't there 13 active volcanoes in the Cascades, Mrs. McBain?" Donna asked with her usual panache for trivial information.
"That's exactly right!" she replied with obvious pleasure at Donna's knowledge of her region. "And please call me Sassy. All my friends do."
Donna was trying to play it cool with the popular Senator and his wife, but at the request her smile lit up the room.
"Actually, I have heard that there's been increased seismic activity up in your neck of the woods lately, Senator," Josh added.
"We may be having more earthquakes of late, but nothing we can't handle," the Senator from
"The two of you are just delightful," Sassy McBain declared. "Aren't they delightful together, Edward?"
Edward nodded, and then elbowed Josh and motioned to the stage. "Similar thing happened to me while watching Sinatra thirty years ago. Since then, Frank works like a charm on the wife every time. My advice, stock up on Enrique Iglesias CDs."
"Huh?" Josh was confused, but didn't have time to ask what the Senator was talking about because Mrs. McBain was still talking.
"…you two must come to our Chesapeake Clambake this summer!"
"Oh?" Donna's eyebrows went up as she looked at Josh. They both started nodding and talking in unison. "We'd… uh… love to."
"Excellent. Excellent, we'll send you an invitation." And with that, the pushy crowd started parting the couples. "Ciao." The Senator's wife waved at them and a dumbfounded Josh and Donna waved back.
"They have that clambake every year, it's famous. A lot of deals are made at it, Leo refused to miss it," Josh whispered loudly in Donna's ear as they walked away.
"I know, and she wants me to call her Sassy! Did you hear that?" Donna replied excitedly. "They're supposed to have an amazing vacation home on
"I remember." Josh sounded mildly disgusted. "She didn't stop mentioning it for weeks."
"Actually, I don't know why they're worried about earthquakes in
"I have never been invited to one of their parties. I've always known them, yet I was never invited." He glanced over at her. "I think you're making me more popular."
"Oh Josh," she demurred, but then ruined the effect by adding, "That goes without saying."
CUT TO:
"Hi." Ronna said softly, peeking around the door.
"You're back?" Claire sounded surprised.
"Yeah… before we leave I just wanted to… sorry, for running out. I know that it seemed like I was judging you for who your father is or something, and I just wanted to clear up that it wasn't like that at all."
"Okay… what was it then?"
"My own foolishness, not a big deal." She was going to leave it at that, but at the look on Claire's face, she continued the explanation. "I like Bono for his activism and music; you like Bono because he's... a sex god... or something. Anyway, it was really nice to meet you. Thanks for letting me… watch... the balls with you. Take care." And she moved to leave yet again. This time for the final time.
"Bye," Claire returned softly before calling, "Wait, one thing."
"What?" Ronna turned back to face her.
But instead of an answer, she found Claire's lips on hers. Warm. Hot. Insistent. The kiss lasted a full ten seconds. Ronna was so stunned she almost didn't kiss her back. Almost. Thankfully she came to her senses and started to participate before the kiss ended.
When Claire pulled back, she looked Ronna in the eye. "I like Bono for his activism and music, too."
CUT TO:
INT:
"May I borrow Donna for a minute, Josh?" The First Lady asked as they approached her. "The Texas Democratic Women are trying to get me to chair a tea or something in the next few weeks. I need you to get me out of it, at least until I get settled. Oh, and Josh, Sam and Lou were just looking for you. Sounded important."
Resignedly, Donna watched Josh walk away as she went with Helen to take care of the tea situation.
CUT TO:
"So what did you tell Baker when he said Toby was a traitor and deserved to fry?" Lester asked incredulously.
"I told him not to breathe that opinion to any person, living or dead, until we talk again. He's going to end up pissing off everyone. The left, who support Toby, and the right, who can use Baker's pardon record as an excuse to paint him with the same cronyism brush with which they're painting Bartlet."
"I know Toby was a friend and colleague to you both, but man, he screwed us." The President rubbed his eyes with one hand as he addressed Josh and Sam. Lou and Lester looked on.
"He screwed President Bartlet first," Lester added helpfully.
"And now Bartlet is screwing us."
"You'd think with all this screwing, we'd be having more fun," Lou intoned. They all looked at her as if she'd grown three heads. She raised a hand. "Sorry."
The President looked between Josh and Sam. "What do we do?"
Sam answered, "Either you come out against the pardon, call Toby a traitor, and charge Bartlet with the worst kind of cronyism, or they destroy Baker's chance at confirmation."
"I don't want to do that."
"You may not have a choice, Sir," Lou replied. "At this point we need to do whatever we need to do in order to get Baker confirmed."
"No," Josh interjected. He'd been quiet thus far.
All four heads jerked to look at him curiously.
"There's a third option." Josh's voice was resolute.
"I'd love to hear it,"
"We tell those lily-livered, opportunistic vultures to shove it." At everyone's stunned expression, he elaborated with a shrug, "We call their bluff."
"What?" Lou exclaimed at the same time Sam started shaking his head.
"Josh, I don’t think this is a bluff," Sam answered.
Josh shook his head. "Oh, it's a bluff, all right. They want to get us to come out against Bartlet and the pardon, and piss off the left of our own party. They want to divide Democrats on this issue."
"Might be a pill we have to swallow."
"No, they are not going to make this the issue. You said it yourself with Baker, Sam. He's going to end up pissing off everybody. So are the Republicans. No one who wants to win an election in the next two to six years wants to be seen as coming out for letting astronauts die. Toby saved the lives of three astronauts. Right now we can't let any member of Congress forget that."
"That's going to work?"
"Yes. Sam, you make sure the message is loud and clear that we will make *the* issue the lives of those astronauts. Anyone who comes after us on a pardon we had nothing to do with, will get it back from us tenfold."
"Good." The President looked back to Josh. "What about this story on the Kiowa Warrior; where are we on that?"
"Under control, Sir," Josh answered quickly.
"Great, let's get back to the party."
Lou fell into step with Josh as they started walking out of the room. "You have all the information from Otto on the blog?"
"Yup," Josh answered. "Very enlightening."
"I know. Otto and Bram also tracked down the Secretary of Defense. He's here. Do you want me to talk to-"
"No." Josh's tone was steely. "I'll take this one myself."
CUT TO:
Josh crossed his arms and leveled his gaze at the newly-minted Secretary of Defense. "Philip, I have every reason to believe that this story was planted by the Defense Department."
"That's ridiculous,” he scoffed.
Josh felt a surge of adrenaline as the old juices began to flow. He'd been on the campaign trail for the last year and he was good at that, but he was also good at this and he'd missed it. "It's hard to believe that Bernard of Bernard's Blogocity in Elkhart, Indiana thought of the angle himself and got it all typed up within ten minutes of the details being released to the media. And our Communications Department tells us Drudge was linked to him within five minutes. That sounds like the work of someone who was given a heads-up and who has an agenda."
"Bernard's Blogocity? Drudge? Does anyone legitimate have it? Why are we even paying attention to the ramblings of some idiot in
Josh stood firm. "Because we have to. Tonight on Drudge, tomorrow on CNN. But we're stopping it before it gets there. "
The Secretary of Defense looked annoyed. "I can assure you I had nothing-"
"I'm not accusing you of anything personally. I’m confident of your loyalty to the President. But the Pentagon is a big place and it’s home to a lot of people with vastly different agendas, and it's your first day just like it's our first day. But somebody underneath you wants to make a point and wants to weaken the Santos Administration on Defense before we even get started. You are a part of the Santos Administration; is that the foot you want to start on?"
"No, of course not. But I don't see why anyone at the Pentagon would do that; what would they have to gain? Anyone who works there would know that the analysis from the flight data recorder will be available eventually."
Josh narrowed his eyes, but otherwise was eerily calm when he spoke. "First off, I would bet it was someone who was upset when the Air Force was allocated that money for the F-22 Raptor. Money that was taken from the Army budget when the Kiowa Warrior fleet wasn't replaced." The Secretary looked surprised at that revelation. "And tonight that someone saw an opportunity. The crash happened, it was the Kiowa Warrior, and they knew that on our first day, while the whole administration was scattered around town, that it would be almost impossible for us to combat the story tonight. Hell, they probably hoped we wouldn't even know about it until tomorrow morning. We wouldn’t have been able to start to understand, let alone control the story, for at least a news cycle or two, and then it's already out there."
"What do you want me to do?" the Secretary asked. "An internal investigation?"
Josh actually laughed at the suggestion. "At the Pentagon? With all due respect, I’m not that naïve. What you're going to do is handle tomorrow morning's crash briefing at the Pentagon yourself. If the question comes up—and I think we both know that it will-- you'll put an end to the story. The Army made the decision not to replace those helicopters because they didn't need replacing yet. Make sure every reporter walks out of there thinking the helicopters are safe and the Defense Department is smart about where it spends taxpayer dollars."
"I can't do that!" he exclaimed.
"Why not? I can assure you it's not in your best interest to anger the President your first day on the job. Besides, do you really want the American people focusing unnecessarily on the age of a helicopter fleet, while you're asking for 10,000 more troops in Astana?"
"No, and I don’t want to upset the President, but what if the report comes back and the age of the aircraft was the cause of the crash?"
"In your estimation, what is the likelihood of that happening?"
"Very unlikely," he admitted.
"Then in the very unlikely event that happens, we'll deal with it and do what we need to do. And by that point, we'll have a clear picture to present about why those helicopters weren't replaced. Facts. On our terms. Not theories put forth by Bernard of Bernard's Blogocity, who is trying to make a case that Democrats are weak on defense spending."
"Okay," he relented. "Please tell the President that I'm going to handle this personally."
"Good." Josh turned to leave, before he stopped and added, "It's not just you. I don't want to hear anyone under your aegis using this crash in an effort to wage a public relations war. If I hear of anyone trying to sell this story, I will be knocking on your door."
"Trust me; I don't want you knocking on my door, Josh."
"You’re damn right you don't; I'm much less forgiving than the President."
CUT TO
Josh emerged from his meeting and immediately sought out Donna.
"There you are." He sounded relieved when he finally found her again. He was still amped up after his meeting with the Defense Secretary. He wanted to tell her all about it, but first things first. "Do you want to meet Bono now? I think we can get up there."
"Nah… that’s alright."
"What?" Josh did a double-take towards her. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
"Are you sure? Because you've been after me to introduce you to Bono since the campaign." He eyed her suspiciously.
She took a deep breath. "There is something I wanted to talk to you about."
Concerned by her demeanor, he grabbed her hand and pulled her out into the lobby. There was a bench in front of a large glass wall. Once they were seated, he turned to her. "Okay..."
Meeting his eye, she asked, "Remember earlier you said I should be working for you?"
Josh's forehead crinkled, but he didn't answer because she continued speaking.
"When I told you about the F-22 Warrior, you asked me why I wasn't working for you and before that, you joked with Helen about stealing me back."
"I remember," Josh replied carefully. "What about it?"
"Maybe that wouldn't be such a bad idea."
"What are you talking about, Donna?"
"Sometimes, the last few weeks. Tonight, really. I wonder if I made a mistake." She rushed to get the words out.
"A mistake…"
"A mistake not taking a job in the West Wing."
He watched her cautiously for a moment, before he took her hand, laced their fingers together, and squeezed. "Is this a mistake?"
"No, but I really want to be in the room. I don't think I realized how much until tonight."
"Okay." He absorbed that information. "But you said we couldn't work together. So if you were to work in the West Wing it would seem to rule out this…" He squeezed her hand again. "And I don't like that idea."
"I don't like that idea, either."
"You know, it's not like you're shut out completely. Heck, you gave me the last piece of the puzzle I needed on the helicopter thing without even trying."
"Think about how good I could be if I was trying."
"I can't." He shook his head sadly. "It's too tempting. I miss working with you every day… you have no idea. But then I remember I come home to you and that's my priority. So I guess it's a matter of priorities." A look of fear stole over Josh's face. "And what's more important to you…"
She didn't hesitate. "Josh, this is more important to me." This time she squeezed his hand reassuringly.
"I don't know… I guess I want to do more than worry about hemlines and hairstyles. Did you know we spent a month choosing designers for all her Inauguration outfits? We looked at literally hundreds of sketches and designs. We actually had people lobbying us. My primary duty has been making sure she isn't going to be trashed on Page Six or in Glamour for what she wears this week. I know that's part of the job and I even find it fun, but ultimately, that's not all I want to do. I want to make more of an impact than that."
"So make more of an impact."
She almost laughed at that; it was so easy for him. "Easy for you to say."
"Donna, map an agenda and go after it."
She thought about that a moment. "You don't understand, Josh. She's so overwhelmed. Right now she's just concerned with learning to navigate the mansion, getting Peter and Miranda settled into school, and not committing a major faux pas."
Josh looked at her earnestly. "So… give her the insider’s tour of the White House as only someone who worked there for seven years can—it's just a matter of her being comfortable and understanding what we do there. As far as the kids, aren't they already back in school? So she should have some free time. And if you're standing next to her every step of the way, she's not going to make any major faux pas. And if she does, you'll be there to fix it. Start small and build from there. Find one issue and go after it."
"Start small," she repeated thoughtfully, a grin starting to spread across her face. "You think I can do it?"
"I know you can."
She absorbed that, before hopping to her feet and tugging him upright.
"Where are we going?"
"You're introducing me to Bono, remember?"
CUT TO
"Lester, I need to talk to you." Sherrie's heart was beating out of her chest and she was afraid she was perspiring profusely. She was usually a cool cucumber, but right now she felt more nervous than she had in her entire life. She had to keep reminding herself that this was worth it. And also, what was done was done.
"What about, Cherry? And why do you have your coat? It's early."
At the nickname, and the teasing way he said it, she smiled in spite of herself. "I don’t think you're going to want to call me that in a minute."
"And why not? I thought we were having a good time tonight." His voice was decidedly flirtatious.
She took a deep breath and then dove in face-first. "I didn't tell you the full story earlier."
"What story?"
"The story of what I do for a living now." She paused a second before continuing. "Over the years, as a publicist I fed sightings of politicians and celebrities at the establishments I represent to different media outlets. For instance, I had an almost daily conversation with Stu Winkle."
Lester immediately straightened his posture and everything about him was on edge, even as his stomach began to sink. "Okay…"
"I don't work for the PR firm anymore. I quit two weeks ago."
Again he said, "Okay…"
"I've started freelance writing. Lester, I did get the tickets through my old job, but I'm here trying to work tonight."
"Work doing what, exactly?" His voice was tight. If she didn't get to the point and soon, he was going to choke it out of her.
"Josh Lyman and Donna Moss are very photogenic," she replied, trying not to cringe at the same time.
"How would you know that?" he asked, realizing immediately that it wasn't the non-sequitur it appeared to be.
"Because my photographer has taken dozens of photos of them tonight and they're amazing. Seriously, they would be wonderful ambassadors for the administration; you should be using that-"
"Your photographer?" He cut her tap-dancing routine short.
She nodded and continued. "Earlier tonight, after meeting them and inadvertently hearing their life… and love story, I pitched a fluffy, positive angle on them to an editor I know. A sidebar." She took a deep breath and willed herself to stop shaking, "A little human interest angle amongst all the Inaugural Ball coverage. Without a Vice President and Second Lady, there's not as much area to spread the focus to, but then here were these fascinating, powerful dual Chiefs of Staff who happened to be dating."
"Okay…" He said the word slowly, trying to wrap his mind around what he was hearing. Part of him couldn't believe that he'd screwed up so badly on his first day; he'd introduced a fledgling gossip writer to the people he was supposed to protect. He swallowed roughly as he mentally assessed the damage. "They won't like it, but so far it doesn't sound bad for the administration. And as the Press Secretary, I don't want to jump out of a window… and at this point, I probably still have a job tomorrow. What aren't you telling me?"
"Ted, the editor, loved it. I mean he really, really loved it. Loved them. Loved the pictures, loved their story. Called them Star-Crossed Staffers."
"What are you saying? Are pictures of them going to appear in the gossip section of the Washington Post tomorrow with a cheesy caption?"
"Lester, please don't hate me. I had no idea, no intention when I saw you earlier, but this is my big break. An opportunity to sell a story right away."
"Bottom line, Sherrie." His voice was rough and all the familiarity from earlier was gone.
"Josh Lyman and Donna Moss are going to be on the cover of People magazine."
FADE TO BLACK